Expectation: House Party
Reality: Peeing with the door open
urbran: thats what you get for singing Katy Perry…
me: hi i like you
crush: thats nice
Mom: I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR ATTITUDE
jeszing: A guy with a white iphone walks into a bar. It’s a gay bar
lliampayne: that high quality picture of a starbucks drink really speaks to me
lintott: i’ve never been on a date 12 year olds get dates and i dont
odair: it’s like i can hear the collective sigh of all my followers when i try to be funny
church: follow jesus
me: does he follow back?
me: promo 4 promo?
jaaaaaaaames: so many :’(
when someone quality starts following you and you don’t want to do anything to make them unfollow you so you’re afraid to post anything
thefountainfaerie: Art thou feeling it now Mr.Krabs?
cobrastarburst: what a good url let’s go to their blo-
me: omg why isn't it working
i dont think anyone has ever called me ”beautiful” everyone just says im ”cute” i feel more like an animal hahahaha
gayforway: the-saint-jimmy: thesassylorax: ...
abuserr: why are 14 year olds pregnant and i cant get a high-five from a boy
my teacher: where is your homework?
me: may i deliver it to you through interpretive dance
spicyjew: my life is just a text post that doesn’t get any notes
rebagelagain: when people on tumblr call me by my name and not my user name
sexualfavours: always chatting about your boyfriend/girlfriend in front of single people should be classed as bullying
When your jam comes on and you're with your best...
stealingcheese: one day i will make a text post that is an internet sensation. one day